Is This Blood-Spatter On My WALL-E Doll?

In honour of the woman in California who thought it was appropriate to mace her fellow Target shoppers this Black Friday, a re-post:

“Mom, what are these red dots all over WALL-E?”
“Oh, honey, don’t be silly… don’t you remember last Christmas? How Daddy had to mace that little old Mexican lady for the last Wii on the shelf?”
“Well, this year, let’s just say, Dad got held up at work and got to Toys-R-Us a little late.”
“You mean…?”
“Yes, honey – Daddy had to go shopping in the parking lot. That’s how much your dad loves you – enough to go shopping with his Glock!”

2 dead After Shots Fired In a Toys ‘R’ Us Store In Southern California

PALM DESERT, Calif. – Two people have died in a shooting incident at a Toys “R” Us store in Southern California on the busiest U.S. shopping day of the year.

Police in Palm Desert, Calif., say it is still unclear if the shooting was connection with the so-called “Black Friday” shopping frenzy.

They say they received calls of shots being fired around 11:35 a.m.

Immediately after the shooting, about 20 people rushed into the World Gym across the street from Toys “R” Us.

The gym’s assistant manager, Glenn Splain, tells The Associated Press that many of them were shaking and crying.

Splain said one witness though the incident began as a fight over a toy that got louder and louder before shots were fired.

Sarah Pacia of Cathedral City told The Desert Sun newspaper she was in the store with her two boys, ages four and six, looking at colouring books when she heard a commotion in the next aisle.

She thought it was people rushing to get a sale item. Then she heard three or four shots.

She said she froze, and store employees calmly escorted her out of the store.

“This is Toys “R” Us. There are kids shopping in there,” Pacia said. Her son Jayden, 4, was clinging to her leg. He told her he didn’t want to die, she said.

Toys “R” Us officials did not immediately return calls seeking comment.

Palm Desert is about 200 kilometres east of Los Angeles.

Oh, and then there’s this little gem, from earlier in the week:

Surging Shoppers Kill New York Wal-Mart Worker

NEW YORK (Reuters) – A man working for Wal-Mart was killed on Friday when a throng of shoppers surged into a Long Island, New York, store and physically broke down the doors, a police spokesman said.

The 34-year-old man was at the entrance of the Valley Stream Walmart store just after it opened at 5 a.m. local time and was knocked to the ground, the police report said.

The exact cause of death was still to be determined by a medical examiner.

Four shoppers, including a 28-year-old pregnant woman, were also taken to local hospitals for injuries sustained in the incident, police said.

Wal-Mart said it was saddened by the death of the man, who was working for a temporary employment agency serving the discount retailer, and by the injuries suffered by shoppers.

“The safety and security of our customers and associates is our top priority,” the world’s largest retailer said in a statement. It said the incident was still under investigation and referred any other inquiries to local police.

The Friday after America’s Thanksgiving holiday is known a Black Friday and marks what is traditionally the busiest retail day of the year, kicking off the Christmas shopping season.

U.S. stores across the country opened in the early hours of Friday to offer discounts to consumers hit by a contracting economy. Hundreds of shoppers waited on line before dawn at some locations to secure deals on holiday gifts.

Can you see the Wal-Mart ads in coming years?

Close On:
BOB, Wal-Mart manager.
“We always knew Cliff had something special.”
Cut To:
A sexagenarian CLIFF standing at the entrance to Wal-Mart, smiling and waving. Cliff looks just like Santa Claus, but in a Wal-Mart uniform.
“So, when he retired from the local police force, we asked him to come work with us.”
Cut To:
MARTHA, Cliff’s wife.
“When the grandkids moved away, Cliffy was heartbroken. But, there are plenty of kids at Wal-Mart every day, and my Cliff knows them all by name.”
Cut To:
Cliff walking hand in hand with a child down the toy aisle, lifting the child up to get that last Transformer doll.
Back To:
Bob, who winks at the camera, saying:
“And then, of course, there’s the Christmas factor…”
Cut To:
Through a Christmas wreath hung over a circular window in the door to the Staff Room, we see Cliff, in silhouette, pulling on his gear. Plenty of Christmasy jingling noises can be heard as we watch.
With an accompanying creak of leather, a black-gloved hand gripping something shiny and black. In the background, a muted clamor of raised voices.
Close on:
A clock rolls from 4:59 to 5:00 a.m.
Close On:
Cliff’s bearded cheek as he draws a deep breath, lets it out, and says:
“Okay, let ’em in.”
Back To:
Bob, still smiling.
“After all, there aren’t too many Santas authorized to use deadly force, right? And, he comes with his own riot gear!”
A roar is heard and we
Cut To:
A scene of total bedlam as a stampeding crowd rushes through the doors, knocking several people flat.
Cut To:
That gloved hand in slo-mo, swinging a baton onto the skull of a tattooed, shaved-headed latino male. Blood spatters onto the lens. An Elmo doll hits the floor and skids in a pool of blood. The gloved hand’s twin dips into frame and retrieves the Elmo doll.
Wider On:
Cliff, in full riot gear over his Santa get-up, shaking the blood off the Elmo doll and handing it with a smile to a totally traumatized 4 year-old blond girl. He tousles her hair, turning her hair red with blood in the process.
Cut To:
Widening angle on the Wal-Mart sign as we reveal the parking lot and the riot therein.
V/O Announcer: “Wal-Mart – we’re where you live.”


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